It Never Fully Goes Away

One of the most frequent questions I get as a pastor is whether the grief from losing a loved one ever gets easier. I can only answer from my own experience.

Today, I had to take Amanda for some routine tests at a hospital. It just happened to be the same hospital where my mother died nine years ago. As I walked onto the property, I was flooded with memories.

Stephen BedardThe last week of my mother’s life was one of the toughest I experienced. She didn’t really know she had cancer until a few weeks before she died. Because the cancer she had was in her esophagus, she couldn’t eat or drink or even swallow pain medication. It was terrible.

I visited her regularly at that hospital, watching her deteriorate every day. Eventually the day came when she was only a lifeless shell.

Is it easier? I don’t know. I suppose that the grief isn’t as intense. But the pain is still there. I still have regrets for things unsaid and not done. I still miss her terribly.

The pain of loss never goes away. However, time does provide space to introduce new and happy memories for the way life is today.

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