Dealing With Anger
James 1:19-21
Introduction
How easily are you angered? Are you the kind of person that can be angered with very little effort by the other person or does it take a lot for someone to get you angry? A related question is about the difference between feeling the anger on the inside and expressing the anger outwardly. Anger is often listed as one of the negative emotions but is anger always wrong? And is there a difference between being angry at a situation and angry at a person?
I believe that these questions are worth asking.
When I think of my personality, I am not generally an angry person, or at least I don’t often show it outwardly. Most people don’t think of me as someone with a bad temper. But there have been a number of incidents in my life that made me angry and even returning to those memories can make me feel the anger rising. That’s just me. Your experience may be different. Whatever your personality, I can guarantee that you have experienced anger at some point. It may have been already today.
As I think about this, I am thankful for the book of James. James is an extremely practical book that deals with issues that we face every day. That includes anger. We are going to look at anger, mostly through the lens of James but also from a few other passages.
Anger is Not Always Wrong
So I think that the first thing we need to ask is whether anger is always wrong. Notice that James says that we should be slow to anger. I understand that to be saying that anger can be dangerous and we should be cautious with it but there may be a time for it. But is this an accurate interpretation? When we turn to the Gospels, we see that Jesus got angry, and the most obvious example was the cleansing of the temple. The reason Jesus was angry was not that there was the selling of animals and the exchange of currency, as those things were necessary for the sacrificial worship system in the temple. The problem was that there was one part of the temple area that was available to Gentiles and it was that space that was taken up by this commerce, thus preventing non-Jews from using their limited space. It was injustice and that was why Jesus got angry.
Interestingly, there was a similar context for the Apostle Paul who got angry with the Apostle Peter as found in Galatians 2. Peter had been eating with the Gentile Christians as well he should have. God made it clear to Peter in Acts with his interaction with Cornelius. But soon as some Jewish Christians came up from Jerusalem, Peter withdrew his fellowship from the Gentiles. Paul could not handle that hypocrisy and confronted Peter to his face.
I think we can think of all sorts of situations in which anger would be appropriate. I think of child abuse, of human trafficking, of systemic racism, of violence toward the innocent. Beyond the big picture issues, you can probably think of events in your life in which you were angry and even with the benefit of time, you are convinced that was the right response. There is a time for anger. Often as humans, we have no power to stop the anger from rising in the moment. Acting on that anger is another story. But I will say that the Bible often links righteous anger with issues of justice.
Be Slow to Anger
If anger is a valid option, then why does James say that we are to be slow to anger? I spend a lot of time on social media and I encounter a lot of angry people, many of them identifying as Christians. The anger they are expressing is not about the suffering of the poor or other marginalized groups. Most often the anger is aimed at people who are different from them, people with different biblical interpretations, with different political leanings, with different lifestyles or expressions. Some people are deeply offended by the fact that there are people who are different from them. They also believe that they have the right to not be offended and so they are angry. Ironically, some of them point to Jesus cleansing the temple as justification for the intensity of their anger toward their opponents. They seem to think that on the average day, Jesus went around turning over tables, chasing people out of buildings, and causing a big stir. The reason that the cleansing of the temple was such a big deal is that this was so unlike Jesus. People paid notice to this because it was unusual. If we are angry all the time of the smallest thing, people will not respond when we get angry over the things worth getting angry over.
The Danger of Anger
James seems to offer a strong warning about anger. It goes beyond the loss of effectiveness if we are angry all the time. What is the problem with anger? I would say that we cannot control the appearance of anger in our minds but we have some say of how long it dwells there and what we do with it. What will we do when we get angry? The first description of anger in the Bible is quite profound. The brothers Cain and Abel offered sacrifices to God but God preferred Abel’s. Cain was understandably upset about this. Listen to the words of God to Cain in his anger:
“Why are you angry, and why is your expression downcast? Is it not true that if you do what is right, you will be fine? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at the door. It desires to dominate you, but you must subdue it.” (Genesis 4:6-7)
Those words are just as relevant to us as they were to Cain. In Cain’s case, he did not subdue it, and he killed his brother out of resentment. Most often our anger does not result in murder but it can cause tremendous damage.
What I find helpful is the difference between anger and wrath. I appreciate this reflection by Carlos Todd on the difference:
“Anger is a natural response to frustration, provocation, or boundary violations. It is a temporary emotion ranging from mild irritation to intense fury. Anger signals that something is wrong and can motivate us to take constructive action or address the source of our frustration.
In contrast, wrath goes beyond ordinary anger. It is a more intense and prolonged form of anger fueled by a strong desire for revenge or harm toward others.”
While there is a difference between anger and wrath, in the moment we cannot see the boundary between the one and the other. And since most often the harm we cause is not physical, it is not always clear what we are doing with our words or actions. Are we just trying to communicate our inner most feelings or are we trying to wound with our words? I know that I have wounded with my words in anger, but it was only clear to me after the fact. This is the danger of anger.
What We Should Do
James’s teaching on anger is part of a broader teaching on how we treat one another. James does not just say be “slow to anger.” He actually begins by saying: “be quick to listen, slow to speak.” We live in such a polarizing time at this point in history. People are retreating into their groups and looking at others as potential dangers. Somehow we have accepted the idea that we must be in a constant stage of outrage. We listen for the slightest hint that someone either over or under emphasizes a particular issue. We look for labels by which we can dismiss people without having to understand them. What if we really embraced “be quick to listen, slow to speak”? I understand that this is a lot of work and it is much easier to just be angry with people who are different. Think about the issue that you are most passionate about. Imagine sitting across the table from someone with the opposite position. Could you really listen to them? Could you hold back your comments and just seek to understand? It is hard but it is really important. Even the attempt is worth it.
Conclusion
As we think of anger, I appreciate the words of Aristotle:
“Anybody can become angry – that is easy, but to be angry with the right person and to the right degree and at the right time and for the right purpose, and in the right way – that is not within everybody’s power and is not easy.”
It would be great if we could achieve Aristotle’s ideal of anger, but most often we won’t. But perhaps we can do what James teaches: “Let every person be quick to listen, slow to speak, slow to anger.” Based on our personalities, this may be harder for some than for others. However, we should not dismiss the damage that unrestrained anger can do to those around us. It is not wrong for us to disagree over certain issues, we actually can learn from one another when respond time with people different from us. We might not be able to prevent the strong feelings that we experience when we are passionate about an issue, but we can do something about our response. Take the time to consider if it is worth being angry about, how we should respond, and how to avoid seeking wrath.
