Thoughtful Reflections on Faith and Life
On Saturday, we went to Kitchener to meet up with Logan and Abby for lunch. It was Abby’s 24th birthday. You might wonder what a birthday lunch looks like with two minimally verbal autistic young adults. What happens when the people you are meeting do not speak back to you? That would be a fair … Read More “A Birthday Lunch” »
If you do a search for Assisted Communication of Facilitated Communication, you will find mainly negative comments. I did a Google search and the first article after the Wikipedia article was one which offered evidence that this was not actually autistic people communicating. If you are not familiar with Assisted or Facilitated Communication, it is … Read More “Assisted Communication: Another Perspective” »
Autism is a wide spectrum (yes, I’m aware that some people do not like the spectrum image). The experience of autism can be radically different from person to person. Some autistic people have an “obvious” disability, perhaps because of a developmental disability or specific behaviours that outwardly seem atypical. But then there are other autistic … Read More “Why Might an Autistic Person Hide “In the Closet”?” »
I am thankful to be able to be a part of the editorial board of the Canadian Journal of Autism Equity. We recently released our annual issue and the theme is: Stigma about Autism and Discrimination against Autistics. This is a vital topic for us to understand when it comes to supporting autistic people. All … Read More “Stigma about Autism and Discrimination against Autistics” »
One of the biggest challenges for people seeking to interact with autistic people is when they are minimally verbal. On the other side, this is equally challenging for minimally verbal autistic folk. Two of my children are minimally verbal, and even having known them all their lives and being able to interpret much, it is … Read More “The Spiritual Experiences and Expressions of Non-or Minimally Speaking Autistic People” »
I find that there are two tendencies when it comes to autism. Some see autism as the worst possible thing. Some parents live in fear that their child will be diagnosed with autism. The rhetoric of RFK Jr is only increasing this. Autism is seen as a thief that steals the very soul of our … Read More “Is Autism Good or Bad?” »
Moving to Nova Scotia, as great as it was, came with a cost and that was being away from Logan and Abby. We wrestled with that decision as we were making the move. Moving back to Ontario meant that we were closer to Logan and Abby and we were excited about this. But then came … Read More “Seeing Logan and Abby” »
Autism has been a part of our lives almost from the beginning of our married life. Amanda and I were married in 2000, our son was born in 2001, and he was diagnosed with autism in 2003. Our daughter was diagnosed with autism soon after. We have had many people feel sorry for us and … Read More “Good News: Autism is Okay” »
By far the most common question we have gotten about our move to Nova Scotia is about what is happening with Logan and Abby. For those who don’t know, they are our two oldest children, both have autism, and both live in group homes. The first thing I want to say is that we have … Read More “What About Logan and Abby?” »
This pandemic has been difficult on our relationship with Logan and Abby. They live in group homes 1.5 hours away. Being group homes, they have had to be very strict in their protocols. In addition to the pandemic, both Logan and Abby have had to change group homes. Now that they are both adults, they … Read More “Good News: Seeing the Kids” »
Normally on Mondays I write a Good News post. The connection with this post won’t be immediately obvious. On the day that I am writing this, it has been ten years since our daughter went to live in a group home. She was only seven years old at the time. Amanda and I have been … Read More “Ten Years Later” »
One of the most difficult things about having nonverbal children with autism is the limits those circumstances put our our communication. That is not to say that there is no communication. They do use one or two words. There is also nonverbal communication that goes on. At the same time, the thing we miss, and … Read More “Good News: A New Way to Communicate” »
One of the most influential scholars in the area of autism. Part of her research has been in the area of the theory of mind. This video may help you to understand how some people with autism think. My main criticism of what she says is that she makes some pretty big generalizations about people … Read More “Uta Frith, Theory of Mind and Autism” »
For many people, this pandemic has been really difficult in terms of church. People would rather be sitting together in a building worshiping than watching a worship service on a computer. But there is a bright side for some families. At Queen Street Baptist Church, we post our worship service on our YouTube channel. It … Read More “Good News: The Kids and Church” »
Is the church welcoming and embracing people of autism? It depends on what congregation and what individual with autism that you ask. This is my second interview with Ron Sandison. Ron, as an individual with autism has great insight into how churches can be more welcoming toward people with disabilities in general and people with … Read More “Autism and the Church” »
With yesterday being Mother’s Day, it was important for us to be able to talk to Logan and Abby. They live in a group home 1.5 hours away. They both have autism and are nonverbal. We have been talking to Logan pretty regularly through Skype. Abby hasn’t really been interested, and we have been getting … Read More “Good News: She Feels Happy” »
Today was a day full of all sorts of emotions. Today is our oldest son’s nineteenth birthday. I remember turning nineteen and what a big deal it was. Unfortunately, we couldn’t make the day what we wanted. Logan has autism and he lives in a group home 1.5 hours away. Normally we would have visited … Read More “An Emotional Day” »
For many of us, the COVID-19 is a radical change in our routine. We have children home from school. We have had to shift to working at home. We have to livestream church services instead of attending in person. This change in the way things normally are can create anxiety for any of us. Think … Read More “COVID-19 and Autism” »
Pixar has been very good, not just with their movies, but with their shorts. One of their newest is called Loop. This is probably the one that has been the most emotionally moving for me. The reason for this is that Loop is about a nonverbal girl with autism named Rene and a boy named … Read More “Loop – Pixar Short About Autism” »
The doctor enters the room with tissuesParents listening, ignorant of the issuesHope inexpressibleLove unconditionale Will the child ever go to bed?Sounds in the night, filling with dreadHope inexpressibleLove unconditional Waiting for words, even one or twoLonging desperately to hear, “I love you”Hope inexpressibleLove unconditional As time and time relentless flowsGaps with peers onward growsHope inexpressibleLove … Read More “Hope inexpressible, Love unconditional (An Autism Poem)” »
A miracle may be a bit of an exaggeration but please hear me out. We had our children Logan and Abby visit today for Christmas. They both have autism and live in a group home over an hour away. People with autism often struggle with unexpected changes. Our daughter Abby is particularly sensitive to this. … Read More “A Christmas Miracle” »
People wonder what it is like to have children who are considered non-verbal. Non-verbal doesn’t mean that there is no verbal communication but it is limited and not the primary means of communication. Our children do find other ways to communicate. we know what they want. They are very good at communicating their desires for … Read More “Good News: Love and Family” »
My daughter brought home a number of books from her school library and I was pleased to see one was Fragile Bones: Harrison and Anna by Lorna Schultz Nicholson. This book revolved around two high school students involved in a Best Buddies program, which seeks to match neuro-typical students with those who are not. In this … Read More “Fragile Bones – Review” »
Someone recently asked me about people with Asperger’s Syndrome and the challenges of Christian faith. Asperger’s is now known simply as autism. I have heard people claim that people with autism struggle with faith. It is true that people with autism have brains that are wired differently. They may encounter faith in different ways. The … Read More “Autism and Faith” »
Our two children with autism are considered nonverbal. That doesn’t mean they have no words, just that they do not typically communicate with verbal speech. Most times we can deal with it. They have no problems asking for what they want. We have learned to understand facial expressions and body language. Recently there was a … Read More “The Challenge of Having a Nonverbal Child” »
For many people, “bye” is a sad word. But my Good News for this week is about that word. For the past two weeks, when I have gone with our daughter Abby on a walk to Tim Horton’s, she has greeted people on the way with a wave and a “bye.” Not hi but bye. … Read More “Good News: Bye!” »
I recently mentioned that we had a great service at our church this past Sunday. One of the things that made it a good service was a family that was visiting. This family happened to have two children with autism. They gave me the heads up before the service, although I had already recognized the … Read More “The Sounds of Autism” »
There has been much work done on autism awareness but there is still a long way to go. This is a great little video on autism. I love how it doesn’t present autism as something to be fixed but as people to be understood. You may find my book on autism helpful as well. How to … Read More “Animated Explanation of Autism” »
I have read many books on autism but Uniquely Human is one of the best. As I read it, my initial reaction was, “I wish I had read this book when my children were diagnosed!” This book is a solid introduction to autism, giving a good number of examples of what autism can look like. … Read More “Uniquely Human – Review” »
Our son Logan has started attending a church in the city where his group home is. I have mentioned this before and we are thankful. I care as a father but I can also see this from the perspective of a pastor. I know from experience that it is not always easy to integrate people … Read More “Good News: A Pastor Who Cares” »
I recently had a discussion about using labels when describing people on the autism spectrum. Some of the people in the discussion felt strongly that labels are completely inappropriate. What do I mean by labels? People with autism are often described as being high-functioning vs low-function or mild vs severe. I will admit that I’m … Read More “Is it Wrong to Label People With Autism?” »
As I approach my fiftieth birthday, I’m writing a number of top five lists. Since autism is something that is close to my heart, I need to blog about this as well. Autism awareness has come a long way but there is still far to go. Here are five things I wish people knew about … Read More “Top Five Things I Wish People Knew About Autism” »
I had a number of options to talk about for my weekly Good News post. I could have did it on a Roger Hodgson concert I attended with a couple of my cousins. I could have done it on encouraging things happening at our church. But I decided to write on Good News that I … Read More “Good News: Logan at Church” »
We went to visit our two children who have autism and who live in a group home. Logan is 17 and Abby is 16. The visit didn’t turn out the way we expected. Abby was unsettled, which was causing Logan to be unsettled. It seemed to get okay at first but quickly escalated. Abby made … Read More “Autism and the Double Meltdown” »
I suspect that most families have unexpected situations and uncontrollable factors when it comes to family dinners and holidays. This is definitely true when the family includes autism. This past weekend was the Canadian Thanksgiving, which should be a time for family to get together. Autism makes things less than simple. Here are some random … Read More “An Autistic Thanksgiving” »
I have been doing some informal research into how many people with autism are in churches. I had a very interesting comment that I think reflects common thinking on autism. One pastor responded by saying, “We don’t have many children in our church.” The funny thing is that I never mentioned children in my question. … Read More “People With Autism Become Adults” »
Like many parents, we sent our children off today for their first day of school for the year. We took the obligatory pictures of our three children and posted them on Facebook. Except we have more than three children. Two of our children have autism and live in a group home over an hour away. … Read More “Autism and the First Day of School” »
How many parents think it is good news when their teenage daughter tells them to go away? This one does. A couple of days ago, I was visiting our children, Logan and Abby, at their group home. Both Logan and Abby have autism and are considered nonverbal. Abby uses an iPad as an augmentative communication … Read More “Good News: “Go Away!”” »
The Good Doctor is a medical drama that airs on ABC and which features a doctor with autism. It is based on an earlier South Korean series. At this point I have only watched the first two episodes and will comment further after watching the first season. These are only my preliminary thoughts. There have … Read More “First Thoughts on The Good Doctor” »
Today is eight years since our daughter Abby moved into a group home. She was only seven years old at the time. That means she has lived away from us longer than she lived with us. That is hard. It wasn’t an easy decision to have Abby move out of our home. No parent wants … Read More “Today is a Hard Day” »
It is important for me to share information about autism. It is vital that our society grow in autism awareness. But is autism is more than a diagnosis, it is about people. Autism never happens apart from real people. Here is a short video of myself and my daughter Abby going out for a walk. … Read More “This is What Autism Looks Like” »
A few weeks ago, we were staying at a hotel with our three youngest children. One of the reasons we went to the hotel is that it had a pool. Since the hotel was in the same city as the group home where our children with autism live. The plan was for our two oldest … Read More “Making Plans With Autism” »
My Good News is that I took a walk to Tim Horton’s. How is that Good News, other than the fact that I really enjoy their steeped tea? This weekend included a visit from our children, Logan and Abby. They have autism and live in a group home over an hour away. Abby has food … Read More “Good News: A Beautiful Day For a Walk” »
In this episode of the podcast, I talk to Ron Sandison about the topic of autism. Ron not only has autism himself, he also is an autism advocate. You can find out more about him at his website Spectrum Inclusion. Ron is also the author of A Parent’s Guide to Autism: Practical Advice. Biblical Wisdom. My … Read More “An Interview With Ron Sandison on Autism” »
Our two oldest children have autism and live in a group home about an hour and a half away. They normally come for visits every other week. Last weekend they were supposed to come for a visit but they didn’t. And I’m glad. How could I be glad that my children didn’t come for a … Read More “Why I’m Glad My Children Didn’t Come For a Visit” »
Our society has come a long way when it comes to autism awareness. People know more about autism than ever before. But how well do they know people with autism? As a part of autism awareness month, I challenge everyone to get to know one person with autism. The person could be anywhere on the … Read More “An Autism Challenge” »
I’m grateful to Lamar Hardwick for sharing his experience with autism. Lamar blogs at The Autistic Pastor. Could you share a little about yourself and what you do? My name is Lamar Hardwick. I am a husband, father of three boys, and the pastor of New Community Church located in Lagrange Georgia. I have been … Read More “Interview With Lamar Hardwick” »
I came across an article from the Charisma magazine website written by Becky Dvorak titled Miraculous Healings for Autism Begin to Manifest. How do I respond to this? When our children were first diagnosed with autism, we had a couple of friends message us out of frustration as to why we didn’t just ask God to … Read More “Miraculous Healings From Autism?” »
My observation of churches is that there is an increase in awareness and compassion about autism. The media has really brought autism to the forefront and a variety of advocacy groups have promoted autism awareness. Many people in our churches are related to or at least know someone with autism. When a Family comes into … Read More “The Autism Opportunity Easily Missed by Churches” »
Our family recently moved to a new house. It is not surprising that in the packing and unpacking that long lost items turn up. I recently noticed on the floor something that I hadn’t seen in years.I saw one of the PECS that Logan and Abby used to use. What are PECS? It stands for picture … Read More “A Relic From the Past” »
This is the first of two-part guest post by Bryan Stoudt. Visit Bryan’s website at the link found in his bio at the end of this post. You can find the first part here. Last time, we saw how hard it can be to stay engaged with our special needs child. But we also began to … Read More “Stay Engaged With Your Special Needs Child (Part 2)” »
This is the first of two-part guest post by Bryan Stoudt. Visit Bryan’s website at the link found in his bio at the end of this post. You can find the second part here. Our special needs kids have a special place in our hearts. Each one is precious and unique, placed in our families as … Read More “Stay Engaged With Your Special Needs Child (Part 1)” »
One of the most important reminders about autism is that everyone with autism is different. My mantra is “if you have met one person with autism, you have met one person with autism.” The worst thing is assuming all people with autism are the same. Having said that, people with autism in their lives can … Read More “Recognizing Autism” »
What are the things that you celebrate as a parent? It may be your child getting their driver’s licence or graduating from university. We may be looking for the big things to get excited about. Things are different for autism parents. Two of our children with autism live in a group home over an hour … Read More “The Power of Little Victories” »
I often say that I blog for myself, that it is it is a way for me to sort through my thoughts and at times vent about what is bugging me. But I must confess that there is another reason. Deep down, I hope that blogging about autism will make a difference in some small … Read More “The Reason I Blog About Autism” »
As I write this, it is two days before our daughter Abby’s fifteenth birthday. It is hard to believe she is well into her teens. It feels like only yesterday she was our little baby. Abby and her brother Logan live in a group home over an hour away. They both have autism and are … Read More “Good News: A Joyful Visit” »
We had an interesting conversation the other day. Our three youngest children are aged 9-11. We were talking about what it will be like when they get their driver’s license. Our youngest, Faith (aged 9), made a comment about our oldest, Logan (aged 16). She asked if Logan would be getting his license soon. Logan, … Read More “Disabilities and the Innocence of Children” »
I recently shared about taking our son with autism out to the park. While we see Logan regularly, it had been a long time since he had been out in public. That is other than church, and our church has known about Logan long before they met him. We had a lot of fun, but … Read More “When People Stare” »
We get a visit from Logan and Abby every other weekend. Abby is happy to come for day visits but Logan likes to stay over night. Whether it is the autism or being a teenager, Logan would prefer to stay inside and play on technology. His perfect day is watching Veggie Tales on TV while … Read More “Good News: Good Cheap Fun” »
Today it is seven years since our daughter went to live in a group home. She was seven years-old at that time. That means that she has now lived half her life away from us. What could cause parents to voluntarily let their seven year-old daughter be taken away? We have had people judge us … Read More “Seven Years Ago Today” »
My oldest daughter is 14 years-old and has autism. And I like to tease her. Don’t worry, I don’t tease her about having autism. I’m not that much of a jerk. Abby doesn’t like it when I sing. That of course is normal and has nothing to do with autism. That is just common sense. … Read More “Why I Tease My Daughter With Autism” »
Today may have been one of the most amazing mornings at church in my life. I shared a couple of weeks ago about how we brought our son with autism to church for the first time. This weekend we had Logan and Abby for a day visit from their group home. Logan requested that he … Read More “Good News: First Communion” »
When it comes to being parents of children with disabilities, there is a connection that goes deep. Even if we have never met or our circumstances are different, there is a commonality and emotional bond. I found this recently with a book by Greg Lucas titled Wrestling With an Angel. Although we are both dads … Read More “Wrestling With an Angel – Review” »
Last weekend, our children with autism were visiting from their group home. It is always great to have them with us. At one point, Our daughter Abby was playing in the backyard. I grabbed a book and sat out on the deck while she played. Part of me felt guilty for reading rather than playing … Read More “Autism and Quality Time” »
Today was one of the happiest Sundays in my life. Many people take it for granted that they can go to church as a family. In our case, our two oldest children have autism and live in a group home 1.5 hours away. It has been around six years since Abby has been with us … Read More “Good News: Bringing Our Son to Church” »
The CDC has said that 1 in 68 children are born with autism. In Canada, the numbers are about 1 in 94. Those are some pretty significant numbers. My question to you is: Do you have people with autism in your church? I don’t mean just children, but people in general. If you do not … Read More “Do You Have People With Autism in Your Church?” »
I recently encountered a series of books called The Adventures of SuperCaptainBraveMan. While I haven’t read the first book, I was sent a copy of the second book called A Spectrum of Love. The premise of the series is that there is young boy named Kyle who has a rare condition that limits his mobility. … Read More “Adventures of SuperCaptainBraveMan: A Spectrum of Love – Review” »
It is common for parents to share their wisdom with each other. Experience provides little tips that we can share with others. This is completely natural and a good thing. But be careful with the advice that you give to parents of children with autism. I recently was talking to an autism mom whose child … Read More “Be Careful With the Advice You Give Autism Parents” »
About fourteen years ago, when our son Logan was diagnosed with autism, I was pretty ignorant about autism. I only knew what I saw in Rainman and St. Elsewhere. Many of our friends and family were equally unaware. Although we have been forced to become aware because of Logan and Abby’s autism, I have noticed … Read More “Good News: Thankful For Autism Awareness” »
Our two oldest children have autism and our experience with them has shaped our entire family. Although there have been some hard days, we have also had some great times as well. I may share the difficult moments in another post but today I will share the six best autism moments. For some context, both … Read More “My Six Favourite Autism Memories” »
I was recently watching the Netflix series, Luke Cage. Throughout the series, I was bothered by the generous use of the N-word, even by the residents of Harlem. I have learned to have an uncomfortable reaction when hearing that word. What about when we use the R-word? What is the R-word? It is “retarded” or … Read More “My Problem With the R-Word” »
The purpose of my Good News post is to pick one good thing that has happened as a way for me to keep positive. While there is often one thing that stands out, this time I’m looking at the big picture. I have been blessed in some amazing ways. Here are some: Amanda and I … Read More “Good News: Seeing the Big Picture” »
The CDC has reported that 1 in 68 children are born with autism. Your church needs decide if you want to include or exclude people with autism. Most churches take the steps to be accessible for physical disabilities with elevators and wheelchair ramps. What about those with disabilities such as autism? Here are some practical … Read More “Tips to Becoming an Autism-Friendly Church” »
Normally, when a person begins as a pastor at a church, they bring their entire immediate family with them. But our family is not normal. Our two oldest children have autism and they live in a group home an hour and a half away. So even though I have been the pastor at Queen Street … Read More “Good News: Introducing My Son to My Church” »
Autism awareness has come a long way but there is still far to go. I have two children with autism. They are both on the severe end and are considered nonverbal. If you met them, you would probably have certain first impressions. But let me tell you what they are really like, from my perspective … Read More “5 Things You Should Know About My Children With Autism” »
This article is a guest post by Ron Sandison. You can find his bio at the conclusion of this post. As a theologian and prodigy with autism I have felt a close connection to King Solomon and a deep appreciation for his writings of Proverbs and Ecclesiastes. 2017, marked my 14th year as a professor … Read More “Five Reasons Why King Solomon Was on the Autism Spectrum” »
I have been hoping to see The Accountant for some time and finally got to watch it today. I was not disappointed. It was one of the best movies that I have seen in a long time. It was entertaining as an action movie but I appreciated it on another level as well. Ben Affleck … Read More “Thoughts on The Accountant” »
I believe that of all the books that I have written, one of the most important is How to Make Your Church Autism-Friendly. It covers a topic that is very close to my heart. There was a good response to the first edition but I felt that there was more that I could share. So … Read More “The New Edition of How to Make Your Church Autism-Friendly!” »
I am so thankful for my wife and the way she is able to put into words our experience as autism parents. Amanda recently wrote a post on her blog, describing exactly what I have been feeling lately. Christmas time will always be a time of remembering for me. Our first child was due on … Read More “Confessions of an Autism Mom” »
Have you ever had someone start to say something, in the sense of revealing information, and you would do anything to stop them? We have many times. When our two children with autism lived with us, both had sleep issues but in different ways. Abby was just messed up when it came to sleep. It … Read More “Nothing is Happening Tomorrow” »
I think that there has been some improvement in the church’s willingness to embrace and minister to people with autism and their families. But often the people with autism that the church has in mind are those on the severe end of the spectrum. What about those with mild autism? These are the people who … Read More “The Church and People With Mild Autism” »
One of the purposes of this blog is to increase awareness about autism. As much as I love to share the positive experiences, the reality is that there are some difficult times. I have no desire to use this as a platform for complaining, but I believe sharing the reality of autism will help people … Read More “An Autistic Evening” »
If you tried to talk to our son, you might find that he would avoid eye contact and probably would hum while you spoke. I suspect that our son is not unique in this. In fact, there is a young man in our church who is very similar. What should you do if you find … Read More “How to Talk to a Person With Autism Who Seems to Ignore You” »
Many people have heard of guide dogs for the blind, but what is an autism service dog? The principle is the same, in that the dog wears a jacket that allows the person to go into public places. One of the main purposes of an autism service dog is safety. Many children with autism are … Read More “What is an Autism Service Dog?” »
Perhaps you know a family that has someone with autism and you desire to support them. But what can you do? I would like to offer five things that you could do to help this family. 1. Treat the family with love and respect rather than pity. 2. Provide some respite by watching their child … Read More “5 Ways to Support a Family With Autism” »
One of the highlights of my life is our regular visits with our children Logan and Abby. Logan and Abby both have autism and they live in a group home about an hour away. This weekend was one of those visits. Abby tends to interact with us more than Logan. When we were having lots … Read More “Good News: The Present of Presence” »
As I write this, it is the Canadian Thanksgiving. We were blessed to have extended family with us for a delicious turkey dinner. It was an enjoyable time. However, our children with autism did not join us for it. We did have our children with autism visit this weekend (they live in a group home). … Read More “Autism and Holiday Dinners” »
We all love to see the stories of people with autism who are exceptionally bright or who have a savant ability. We are encouraged when we see people with autism who become very successful. We need to see those stories but we need to balance them with the other side of autism. In this video, … Read More “The Side of Autism You Don’t Want to See” »
Presented and narrated by actor Hugo Weaving, this animation looks at the key characteristics of autism as experienced by his 16-year-old nephew Ky Greenwood. The project was part of Sentis’ “Great Works” program and was inspired by Ky’s father William who is part of the Sentis team. Autism Queensland is proud to support this film.
What I’m going to talk about here is relevant to many disabilities, but since autism is my experience, I will focus there. If you have a child with autism in your Sunday school, should you place them with other children of their age level or with other children of their intellectual level? I’m speaking … Read More “Where Do Autistic Children Belong in Sunday School?” »
No matter what a person thinks of neuro-diversity and the positive aspects of autism, it is always difficult when a child receives a diagnosis of autism. There are a thousand things going through the parent’s mind. It is natural for family and friends to want to encourage and comfort the parent. Sometimes it is better … Read More “4 Things Not to Say to a Parent When a Child is Diagnosed With Autism” »
Children with autism are known for making noise in church. Sometimes they say what some adults want to say. One Sunday, our son said with a fairly loud voice during the service, “Just kill me now!” In case you are wondering, I wasn’t preaching at the time. You need to realize that parents are very … Read More “5 Things To Do When a Child With Autism Makes Noise in Church” »
